Fun Times in Kimberley B.C.

  So, what did I learn from the "Awakening the Wild" festival? I learned that art isn't just about what the artist meant to make. It's about what you see. And sometimes, what you see is a wiener dog, a criminal enterprise run by a bunch of dancing fabric sails, or a very brave vacuum cleaner saving a rare piece of moss from a Mayor's head. My "Outer Giggle Theory" was proven correct. It was a very scientific and very fun time in Kimberley, B.C.          Click Here to Save Your Money On Over 5000 Products

 The real "awakening," however, came from the "Wildernauts." These were robots made by our local eccentric inventor, Phineas Cogsworth, a man who insists his best engineering advice comes directly from a team of very serious badgers. His robots were… something else. One, a toaster named Toasty, spent most of the festival trying to interview a paving stone about its feelings (it concluded the stone was "lithically shy"). Another, an egg-beater bot, tried to conduct a hard-hitting journalistic investigation into a hot dog bun. But the star of the show was Vroomhilda, a very determined vacuum cleaner that looked like a badger. During the opening ceremony, Vroomhilda decided that the Mayor's hairpiece was actually an "Extremely Rare Misplaced Tuft of Endangered Mountain Moss (sub-species: Slightly Surprised Squirrel)." With a triumphant WHOOMP! , Vroomhilda "rescued" the moss right off the Mayor's head. The Mayor was so shocked he j...

 First, there was the art. My mom, Heide, makes very serious art out of things she finds in the forest, like rocks and driftwood. She calls one of her biggest pieces "Whispers of the Forgotten Forest." It's very profound. Except, as we discovered, if you stand in just the right spot, it looks exactly like a giant, sleeping wiener dog. A very nice lady with plastic flamingos on her hat was very moved by it. This led me to my "Outer Giggle Theory of Art," which states that the most important part of art is whatever funny thing pops into your head when you look at it. Then there was Jenifer's art. She made these amazing, giant, moving sculptures out of shiny metal and cloth that she called "happy dancing ghosts." They were supposed to be all about making the wind visible and inspiring wonder. But according to our Festival Analysis Team's important research, they were probably also involved in either a high-stakes "illicit whisper trafficking...

  Hi there. My name is John, and this summer my town, Kimberley, decided to "Awaken the Wild." It turns out, the wild is very, very weird. And very, very funny. As the unofficial lead investigator for the "Festival Analysis Team" (a very important team consisting of me, my new friend Jenifer, and her friend Linda, who takes pictures of everything), I feel it's my duty to report our findings.     Click Here to Save Your Money On Over 5000 Products